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Executive Director's Reflections: It all Comes Down to This - How You Deal with Difference |
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Written by Charles Gibbs
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Sunday, 12 March 2006 |
"It all comes down to this - how you deal with difference."
I first heard these words years ago, offered by my dear friend, Mohammed Abu-Nimer, as the summation of years of study and an investment of tens of thousands of dollars to earn one of the first Ph.D.s in religiously based peacebuilding.
Mohammed's words had the ring of truth then, and have stayed with me ever since, taking on an ever more profound significance - It all comes down to how we deal with difference.
Mohammed's other insight that has stayed with me was a bell curve he developed describing the cycle of violence. Though I can't draw Mohammed's curve, I will attempt to create a picture of it in words.
First, imagine a curve shaped like an upside down bell. I'll begin on the topleft side of the bell and describe the journey down the left side, to the bottom of the bell and then up the right side to the top, almost as if we're descending one side of a canyon and climbing up the other.
We begin, at the top left side - with difference.
Before you read any further, I invite you to imagine a difference, any difference. That shouldn't be difficult since it's impossible to have two human beings in a room together without having difference. Culture, race, religion, gender, age, nationality, sexual orientation...the list could be endless.
You can imagine the differences between two people. For instance, both my family and my wife's family are Episcopalians. My sister and one of my wife's sisters married Jewish men. I might start by imaging all the differences in either of those couples.
Or, we might begin by imaging the differences between Israelis and Palestinians; or Indians and Pakistanis; or Indigenous people and Christians (recognizing that many Indigenous people are also Christian) in Latin America.
With a specific image of difference as our companion, we begin our descent. As we descend, difference leads to conflict. This happens every day on every scale of human interaction - from individual, to followers of different faiths, to nation states.
As we continue our descent, there is some likelihood that conflict beginning non-violently will become violent - a war of words will become a war of fists or far more destructive weapons. What started as an experience of difference has devolved into armed conflict.
If the conditions are just wrong, small scale armed conflict can feed on itself and escalate into large scale armed conflict - a war. Like a fire feeding on itself and erupting into a firestorm, wars, once started, rage out of control, causing unimaginable damage - the loss of human and other life, the destruction of the infrastructure of civilization and the environment, and the loss of a positive future.
As we reach the depth of war's devastation, we have reached the bottom of our climb, the depth of the bell curve. We remain at the bottom until one side wins or we, the parties in the conflict, grow so exhausted by the devastation that it becomes preferable to seek to settle our differences through negotiation than to continue the violence.
In either case, at some point, we begin to ascend from the depths of violence by negotiating a ceasefire, which will lead to a peace treaty, setting the guidelines to resolve the conflict without further violence.
As the violence ceases and we climb further up the slope, we have the opportunity to absorb the terrible toll the violence has exacted, to assess the damage it has caused and to begin to plan for reconstruction.
If our efforts at reconstruction are successful and if the underlying causes of the violence are effectively addressed in a peace agreement, we may continue our ascent from the depths of destruction. If not, we may turn around and begin, once again, to descend into armed conflict, into a time of renewed destruction and devastation.
But imagining our success at rebuilding and resolving the underlying issues, we reach a point, near the end of our ascent out of violence, where we are able actively to engage in healing and reconciliation, to rebuild shattered trust and the ability to experience the other with empathy and compassion.
With great perseverance, we may finish our ascent where we began, on level ground, living with difference peaceably.
As we stand on that level ground, I find myself exhausted by our journey and exhilarated by the possibilities of the future. Having climbed out of the depths of violence, what mountains of shared aspiration might we scale together? The mountains of ample food, or excellent education or equal rights for all?
If you're still reading, I want to thank you for making this journey with me. In my imagination, I have made it countless times since I first heard Mohammed explain his bell curve. Each time, I have finished the journey overwhelmed by the millennia of unnecessary devastation and suffering humanity has inflicted on itself and the Earth community.
And I have been left with one question: How do we, as a species, develop the skills and the will to deal with difference in ways that allow us to resolve conflict without resorting to violence, so that we might liberate the resources squandered on violence to build a better future for all?
URI is a living attempt to provide answers to that question. The answers we develop - beginning with us as individuals and expanding to include the entire human community - are an offering to help change this tragic dimension of human history.
As food for our journey together, I urge you to share any answers or insights that you may have found.
And I wish you abundant blessings in your lives and work.
Love,
Charles
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Last Updated ( Wednesday, 31 May 2006 )
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